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William Shake-speare : Sonnet 130

Dim Lady

My honeybunch’s peepers are nothing like neon. Today’s special at Red Lobster is redder than her kisser. If Liquid paper is white, her racks are institutional beige. If her mop were Slinkys, dishwater Slinkys would grow on her noggin. I have seen tablecloths in Shakey’s Pizza Parlors, red and white, but no such picnic colors do I see in her mug. And in some minty-fresh mouthwashes there is more sweetness than in the garlic breeze my main squeeze wheezes. I love to hear her rap, yet I’m aware that Muzak has a hipper beat. I don’t know any Marilyn Monroes. My ball and chain is plain from head to toe. And yet, by gosh, my scrumptious Twinkie has as much sex appeal for me as any lanky model or platinum movie idol who’s hyped beyond belief.

–Harryette Mullen

Follow me on the Twittah

  • Youngest son's soccer team kicks more goals than the other team. Still loses. 4 days ago
  • Hey buddy, nice purse. Yeah I know it's a baby bjorn & that you're an amazing dad, but the thing is you'll never catch me in that thing. 6 days ago
  • To forestall my midlife crisis, my wife is allowing me to put a racers stripe on the mini van. 1 week ago
  • I don't care if you think I'm crude & sexist, if I see you with two large coffee mugs and you're my wife I'm going to say, "Hey, nice mugs." 1 week ago
  • My wife gets me sexy undies cause she likes me to dance for- oh here she is. She's shaking her head and laughing. Oh. 1 week ago

The Novel I’m Now Reading

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