If Captain America is so great then why is he still a captain?

Five Star General America, that’s a hero.

Captain America is a great recruiting tool. I just signed up for those butterscotch pecs.

I’m glad that Red Skull ripped off that Hugo Weaving mask. It was scaring the kids.

Speaking of Hugo Weaving masks, can we all just agree to chip in and buy Tommy Lee Jones one?

It was a little awkward when that Harley Davidson commercial showed up, but the Captain just went with it.

It’s cool that Cap throws his shield. He’s like, “Ya knows what’s a great idea? Projectiles.”

Hawkeye is going to feel like a sucker when his arrows don’t come back to him. Cap and Thor will just laugh and laugh.

A modern day Captain America would be terrible. What would he throw? His night goggles?

The real heroes are of course the soldiers who don’t have big gays abs.

“When Chris Evans first took his shirt off on the set of Captain America, I just instinctively grabbed his man boob. They kept it in the film. So we did a couple of takes of me being really inappropriate with my hand on his pec for the duration of the scene.”

-Hayley Atwell

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