from the Mystery Man on Film blog.

My favs:

6) ‘We’ve been expecting you…’
Whenever a hero fights his way into the villains fortress, escaping multiple assassination attempts, he will be caught and taken to the villain, who will invariably greet him with, “Weve been expecting you.”

11) All-Seeing Camera
The remarkable ability of a stationary surveillance camera or news camera operated by a lone cameraman to film or video an incident from several different angles and distances all at once. When played back, the resulting film or videotape exactly duplicates the original point-of-view of the audience, right down to the sequence of the montage.

12) Angel Limited-Involvement Rule
Modern movie angels mostly seem to visit earth in order to smoke cigarettes, eat pizza, and show what regular Joes they are. Although famine, war, disease and higher prices torment the globe, they solve such problems as a guy who has stopped dating because hes lost his faith in women.

13) Anti-Anti-Auto Theft Device
Any actor can start any car by pulling any two wires from under the dash and touching them together to make them spark. This not only starts the car but it also defeats the steering columns locking mechanism. 

15) Archivist Killer Syndrome
Many serial killers could also find employment as the authors of double-acrostics and conundrums. In searching for such killers, hero detectives invariably find an abandoned apartment with newspaper clippings and photos on the wall showing the killers a) victims b) pursuer c) next victim and d) a message to his pursuers.

30) Bloody Fingertip Rule
If a character sees anything looking like blood, he must put his finger in it and hold it up before realizing that it is blood. Corollary: If the substance is not blood, the character must smell it or taste it before realizing what it is.

 

Go read the rest and tell me the other good ones…

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