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Found at FFFFound.

Quit running like that.

Also, quit fooling with your hair. You’re jogging, not styling.

from the Mystery Man on Film blog.

My favs:

6) ‘We’ve been expecting you…’
Whenever a hero fights his way into the villains fortress, escaping multiple assassination attempts, he will be caught and taken to the villain, who will invariably greet him with, “Weve been expecting you.”

11) All-Seeing Camera
The remarkable ability of a stationary surveillance camera or news camera operated by a lone cameraman to film or video an incident from several different angles and distances all at once. When played back, the resulting film or videotape exactly duplicates the original point-of-view of the audience, right down to the sequence of the montage.

12) Angel Limited-Involvement Rule
Modern movie angels mostly seem to visit earth in order to smoke cigarettes, eat pizza, and show what regular Joes they are. Although famine, war, disease and higher prices torment the globe, they solve such problems as a guy who has stopped dating because hes lost his faith in women.

13) Anti-Anti-Auto Theft Device
Any actor can start any car by pulling any two wires from under the dash and touching them together to make them spark. This not only starts the car but it also defeats the steering columns locking mechanism. 

15) Archivist Killer Syndrome
Many serial killers could also find employment as the authors of double-acrostics and conundrums. In searching for such killers, hero detectives invariably find an abandoned apartment with newspaper clippings and photos on the wall showing the killers a) victims b) pursuer c) next victim and d) a message to his pursuers.

30) Bloody Fingertip Rule
If a character sees anything looking like blood, he must put his finger in it and hold it up before realizing that it is blood. Corollary: If the substance is not blood, the character must smell it or taste it before realizing what it is.

 

Go read the rest and tell me the other good ones…

The art of lying is the art of the practical. It ought never be indulged in for the pure pleasure of the thing, since overusage dulls the instrument, corrodes the character, and despoils the spirit… Curb, therefore, your imagination. Let the lie be delivered full-face, eye to eye, and without scratching of the scalp. Let it be blunt and forthright and so simple that you can repeat it in detail and under oath 10 years hence. But let it, for all of its simplicity, contain one fantastical element of creative ingenuity – one and no more – designed to capture the attention of the listener and to convince him that, since no one would dare to invent the improbability you have inserted, its mere existence places the stamp of truth upon everything you have said.

-Dalton Trumbo, screenwriter

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For those of you that watch things on Hulu let me introduce you to things on Crackle:

Groundhog Day

Big Fish

Three Stooges episodes

Also: A Few Good Men, The Professional,  lots o Godzilla movies and much much more.

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Everybody loves to quote the movies. We also love to misquote the movies.

Here are the Top 10 Most Misquoted Lines

1. “Luke, I am your father” – V: The Empire Strikes Back (1980)

2. “Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the fairest of them all?” – Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs (1937)

3. “Do you feel lucky, punk?” – Dirty Harry (1971)

4. “Play it again, Sam” – Casablanca (1942)

5. “Hello, Clarice” – The Silence of the Lambs (1991)

6. “Beam me up, Scotty” – Star Trek: The Motion Picture (1979)

7. “Frankly, Scarlett, I don’t give a damn” – Gone With the Wind (1939)

8. “If you build it, they will come” – Field of Dreams (1989)

9. “I don’t think we’re in Kansas anymore, Toto” – The Wizard of Oz (1939)

10. “Mrs Robinson, are you trying to seduce me?” – The Graduate (1967)

Follow me on the Twittah

  • My wife hates it when I eat chips in bed, which is a ridiculous thing to get upset over. I mean, I hate how many chips get all over the bed. 1 month ago
  • HYPOTHETICAL QUESTION: Say you have a pic of your wife in a red "I Heart Cans" cap flashing a gang sign. Could you post it on the internet? 1 month ago
  • Really bummed cause I got a ticket. Asked the cop if he spoke Police-Latin. Upyay. 2 months ago
  • Wife just said that I should "exfoliate my eyebrows". She's flirting, right? That's the kinky stuff, right? 2 months ago
  • FACT: (Shhhh, the word really is pronounced "lysdexic") 2 months ago

The Novel I’m Now Reading

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